It's so hard to say, "I'm sorry"
It's so hard to self reflect
Make the world a better place, I put a bullet in my head
I'm still running outta friends, steady running from the past
It's so hard to say, "I'm sorry"
It's so hard to self reflect
Make the world a better place, I put a bullet in my head
I'm still running outta friends, steady running from the past
Ain't no lil' piece of heaven, all these demons that I have
I am broken, I am tired, I am lonely and depressed
I am made up of mistakes, I'll start going down the list
I'm a product of my father, I'm an addict like my sister
I'm so sick, I need a doctor
Spent some time in institutions back at home with my mama
Had to run away to Houston
Had a girl, she was a goddess, I fucked up and had to lose her
I see darkness all around me, put my soul into the music
I am always fucking doubting my every single movement
I saw violence in my home, I seen shit I can't forget
I got anxieties and tendencies and memories repressed
Rip this shit up off my chest, put these bullets in a clip
Press the muzzle to my face and pull the trigger, now I'm—
It's so hard to end it all, I wanna try to make it right
It's so hard to live at all, all these obstacles in life
Make it hard for us all, made a fuck-up of my life
I'll give anything at all to take back a little time
[Verse 2]
I'm a beast, I'm a dawg, I'm a runaway slave
I'm like Malcolm, I'm like Martin bein' locked in a cage
Tell Jesus, "Come and save me, I got goals and a pager"
Misdemeanors on the papers, El Dorado's on the dayton
See me float above the pavement
I'm a fuckin' mental patient, that's my fuckin' mission statement
I've been sittin', waitin' patient
I can hear what niggas sayin'
Send me curses, see me prayin'
I can sell a blunt to Satan, all these trenches that I lay in
All this chaos that I stay in
See my fate and know it's waitin'
This a new beginning, call me Jesus, king of niggas
My sermon is delivered, rollin' swishers, writin' scriptures
Many pains and many issues, this my written crucifixion
I'ma sing a song of David
I remember Wayne and Baby
I done seen them niggas leakin', screamin', "Jesus, come and save me"
I don't know if I'ma make it, I just know that life ain't easy
Gettin' harder while I'm breathin'
Niggas die inside of Beamers, they don't even need a reason
Guns clappin', get to squeezin'
Niggas killin', it ain't easy
Rent due and it ain't easy
Call his name but he ain't breathin'
Momma cryin', it ain't easy
Hard times, it ain't easy
It ain't easy
Teško je reći, "oprosti"
Teško se samo reflektirati
Učinite svijet boljim mjestom, ubacio sam mu metak u glavu
Još uvijek bježim od prijatelja, neprestano trčim iz prošlosti
To nije nikakav veliki raj, svi ti demoni koje imam
Slomljena sam, umorna sam, usamljena sam i depresivna
Sastavljen sam od grešaka, započet ću spuštanjem liste
Ja sam proizvod svog oca, ovisnik sam poput moje sestre
Tako sam bolesna, treba mi ljekar
Proveo sam neko vrijeme u institucijama kod kuće kod moje mame
Morao sam pobjeći u Houston
Da sam imao djevojku, bila je boginja, zajebao sam se i morao sam je izgubiti
Vidim mrak svuda oko sebe, stavim dušu u muziku
Uvijek se jebeno sumnjam u svaki moj pokret
Vidio sam nasilje u svom domu, vidio sam sranja koja ne mogu zaboraviti
Oslobođen sam tjeskobe i sklonosti i sjećanja
Izvadi mi ovo sranje na grudi, a ove metke stavite u kopču
Pritisnite njušku na lice i povucite obarač, a sada sam -
Tako je teško sve to završiti, želim pokušati to ispraviti
Teško je uopće živjeti, sve ove prepreke u životu
Da mi bude teško za sve, da sam zajebao moj život
Dati ću vam sve da uzmem malo vremena
[Stih 2]
Ja sam zvijer, ja sam zec, bježeći rob
Ja sam poput Malcolma, kao da je Martin zatvoren u kavez
Reci Isusu: "Dođi i spasi me, imam ciljeve i pozivne pozive"
Prekršaji na papirima, El Dorado u dnevnom redu
Vidite me kako lebdim iznad kolnika
Ja sam jebeni mentalni pacijent, to je moja izjava o misiji
Sjedio sam, čekao pacijenta
Mogu čuti šta crnjaci govore
Pošaljite mi psovke, vidite me kako se molim
Mogu prodati Sotonu sve te rovove u koje sam ležao
Sav taj haos u kojem ostajem
Pogledajte moju sudbinu i znajte da čeka
Ovo je novi početak, nazovite me Isusom, kraljem crnja
Moja propovijed je održana, rolajući pljeskavice, pišu pisma
Mnogo bolova i mnogo problema, ovo je moje pismeno raspeće
Pjevam Davidovu pjesmu
Sjećam se Wayna i Baby
Vidio sam ih kako crnjave curiju, vrište, "Isuse, dođi i spasi me"
Ne znam hoću li uspeti, samo znam da život nije lak
Postajem sve teže dok dišem
Nigeri umiru unutar Beamera, čak im i ne treba razlog
Puške plješću, doći do stiska
Crnjaci ubijaju, nije lako
Iznajmljivanje dospijeva i nije lako
Nazovite mu ime, ali ne diše
Mama plače, nije lako
Teška vremena, nije lako
Nije lako