It's so hard to say, "I'm sorry"
It's so hard to self reflect
Make the world a better place, I put a bullet in my head
I'm still running outta friends, steady running from the past
It's so hard to say, "I'm sorry"
It's so hard to self reflect
Make the world a better place, I put a bullet in my head
I'm still running outta friends, steady running from the past
Ain't no lil' piece of heaven, all these demons that I have
I am broken, I am tired, I am lonely and depressed
I am made up of mistakes, I'll start going down the list
I'm a product of my father, I'm an addict like my sister
I'm so sick, I need a doctor
Spent some time in institutions back at home with my mama
Had to run away to Houston
Had a girl, she was a goddess, I fucked up and had to lose her
I see darkness all around me, put my soul into the music
I am always fucking doubting my every single movement
I saw violence in my home, I seen shit I can't forget
I got anxieties and tendencies and memories repressed
Rip this shit up off my chest, put these bullets in a clip
Press the muzzle to my face and pull the trigger, now I'm—
It's so hard to end it all, I wanna try to make it right
It's so hard to live at all, all these obstacles in life
Make it hard for us all, made a fuck-up of my life
I'll give anything at all to take back a little time
[Verse 2]
I'm a beast, I'm a dawg, I'm a runaway slave
I'm like Malcolm, I'm like Martin bein' locked in a cage
Tell Jesus, "Come and save me, I got goals and a pager"
Misdemeanors on the papers, El Dorados on the Daytons
See me float above the pavement
I'm a fuckin' mental patient, that's my fuckin' mission statement
I've been sittin', waitin' patient
I can hear what niggas sayin', send me curses, see me prayin'
I can sell a blunt to Satan, all these trenches that I lay in
All this chaos that I stay in, see my fate and know it's waitin'
This a new beginning, call me Jesus, king of niggas
My sermon is delivered, rollin' swishers, writin' scriptures
Many pains and many issues, this my written crucifixion
I'ma sing a song of David, I remember Wayne and Baby
I done seen them niggas leakin'
Screamin', "Jesus, come and save me"
I don't know if I'ma make it, I just know that life ain't easy
Gettin' harder while I'm breathin'
Niggas die inside of Beamers, they don't even need a reason
Guns clappin', get to squeezin'
Niggas killin', it ain't easy
Rent due and it ain't easy
Call his name but he ain't breathin'
Mama cryin', it ain't easy
Hard times, it ain't easy
It ain't easy
Kunzima kakhulu ukuthi, "ngiyaxolisa"
Kunzima kakhulu ukuzindla
Yenza umhlaba ube yindawo engcono, ngibeka inhlamvu ekhanda lami
Ngikhuluma nje ngiphuma nabangane abangaphandle, ngigijima ngokuqinile kusukela kudala
Kayilona ucezu lwezulu lezulu, wonke la amademoni enginawo
Ngiphukile, ngikhathele, nginomzwangedwa futhi ngicindezelekile
Ngenziwa ngamaphutha, ngizoqala ukwehla ohlwini
Ngingumkhiqizo kababa, ngingumlutha onjenge udadewethu
Ngiyagula kakhulu, ngidinga udokotela
Ngisebenzise isikhathi esithile ezikhungweni emuva ekhaya nomama
Bekumele abalekele eHouston
Ukuba nentombazane, wayengunkulunkulukazi, ngamxhaxha futhi ngamdela
Ngibona ubumnyama bungizungezile, ngifaka umphefumulo wami emculweni
Ngihlala ngicabanga ngokungabaza ukunyakaza kwami ngakunye
Ngabona udlame ekhaya lami, ngibone isithonga engingalukhohlwa
Ngathola ukukhathazeka nokuthambekela nezinkumbulo ezicindezelwe
Susa lolu shizi esifubeni sami, ubeke lezi zinhlamvu ngesiqeshana
Cindezela isizalo ebusweni bami bese udonsa isigaxa, manje sengingu-
Kunzima kakhulu ukukuqeda konke, ngifuna ukukulungisa
Kunzima kakhulu ukuphila, zonke lezi zingqinamba empilweni
Kwenze kube nzima kithina sonke, wenza i-fuck-up yempilo yami
Ngizonikeza noma yini ukuze ngibuyise isikhashana
[Ivesi 2]
Ngiyisilo, ngiyisiwula, ngiyisigqila esibalekayo
Ngifana noMalcolm, ngifana noMartin bein 'okhiyiwe ekheji
Tshela uJesu, "Woza ungisindise, ngithole imigomo kanye no-pager"
Ama-Misdemeanors emaphepheni, i-El Dorados kuma-Daytons
Ngibone ngintanta ngaphezulu kwendlela
Ngiyisiguli esisengqondweni se-fuckin, leso isitatimende sami se-fuckin '
Ngibe yistinin ', waitin' isiguli
Ngiyakuzwa okushiwo yi-niggas sayin ', ngithumele iziqalekiso, ungibone ngithandaza'
Ngingathengisa into eshisiwe kuSathane, yonke le mikhondo engibeka kuyo
Konke lokhu kudideka engihlala kukho, bona isiphetho sami futhi ngazi ukuthi yi-waitin '
Lesi isiqalo esisha, ngibize uJesu, inkosi ye-niggas
Intshumayelo yami ihanjiswa, ama-rollin 'abadobi, imibhalo ye-Author "
Ubuhlungu obuningi nezinkinga eziningi, lokhu kubethelwa kwami okubhaliwe
Ngihlabelela ingoma kaDavid, ngikhumbula uWayne noMntwana
Ngibabonile be-niggas leakin '
Screamin ', "Jesu woza ungisindise"
Angazi uma ngikwenzile, ngiyazi nje ukuthi impilo ayikho lula
Gettin 'nzima ngenkathi ngiphefumula'
AbakwaNiggas bafa ngaphakathi kweBeamers, abadingi ngisho nesizathu
Izibhamu ziyimbokodo ', finyelela ku-squeezin'
I-Niggas killin ', akulula
Qasha ngenxa futhi akulula
Mbize ngegama kepha akaphefumuli '
Umama cryin ', akulula
Izikhathi ezinzima, akulula
Akulula