Girl, I hope you understand, I wanted to hold your hand
But I can't, wanted to be your man back then
And you knew I fell for you, but you just broke my heart in two
I was sad, mad, and broken on my bed
Girl, I hope you understand, I wanted to hold your hand
But I can't, wanted to be your man back then
And you knew I fell for you, but you just broke my heart in two
I was sad, mad, and broken on my bed
Hoping I get rid of all the voices in my head
[Verse 1]
I was opening a packet of an undeveloped med
When I was met with a prescription of a bullet made of lead
And when I woke up in an hour in a pool of my own sweat
I said, "I swear to God I'll never even try to sleep again"
So instead, I took my pen and started writing evidence
And when I started making sense, I found that I had reached the end
Oh, I'm upset, I have no friends, you wanna bet, you're just pretend?
You're just a pet confined within the lines of writing, you're not shit
I thought I stopped my psychopathic ways, I swear I did
I said I'd talk to people 'bout the problematic life I lived
They were my neighbors; razor blades
And different flavored pills I hit
Therefore, I'm at, surely, my last straw
I'm so gassed, stuck in the past, I said that
[Chorus]
Girl, I hope you understand, I wanted to hold your hand
But I can't, wanted to be your man back then
[Post-Chorus]
And so far I never held you with my arms
So it's hard to be the one you aren't with
Instead filled with anxiety, always was a part of me
Guess I'm not cut out to be
[Verse 2]
Somebody 'cause it's not me, I'm not used to all the talking
Was an introvert that had converted feelings into writing
Used to cope with all my problems using notes and lots of rhyming
Used to hope for better days whenever nights would have me crying
I'm not lying when I say that I would rather die than go back
To the times I would try and be the guy the people know
As always fighting with the demons hiding far behind my eyelids
On an island full of violence, in my head I had two pilots
Oh, the sun don't shine and skies turn grey
I feel it coursing through my veins
I've said before I'm not okay
But you don't listen anyway
You know I tried, you turned away
You straight-up lied right to my face
You fucked my life, ruined my day
But you don't know, so I'll say
[Bridge]
Nothing can fill this silence, no one can love like I did
(You don't know, so I'll say)
Nobody cares, you lied, it's not fair, you still deny it
(So I'll say)
Nothing can fill this silence, no one can love like I did
(You don't know, so I'll say)
Nobody cares, you lied, it's not fair, you still deny it
(So I'll say)
[Chorus]
Girl, I hope you understand, I wanted to hold your hand
But I can't, wanted to be your man back then
[Post-Chorus]
And too bad I know I can't wake up because I lost my way
And you don't give a fuck about me, this could be a dream
I can't see the things that you see, so please, oh
[Chorus]
Girl, I hope you understand, I wanted to hold your hand
But I can't, wanted to be your man back then
[Post-Chorus]
And you had known and played along
You were my home, I wrote you songs
Now you're dead to me, effectively
Removed yourself outside my dreams
Djevojko, nadam se da razumiješ, htio sam te držati za ruku
Ali ne mogu, tada sam htio biti tvoj čovjek
I znao si da sam pao na tebe, ali upravo si mi slomio srce u dva
Bila sam tužna, luda i slomljena na svom krevetu
Nadajući se da ću se riješiti svih glasova u glavi
[Stih 1]
Otvarao sam paket nerazvijenog meda
Kad su me upoznali s receptom metka napravljenog od olova
A kad sam se probudio za sat vremena u bazenu vlastitog znoja
Rekao sam: "Kunem se Bogom, nikad više neću pokušati spavati"
Umjesto toga, uzeo sam olovku i počeo pisati dokaze
A kad sam počeo imati smisla, ustanovio sam da sam došao do kraja
Oh, uzrujan sam, nemam prijatelja, želiš se kladiti, samo se pretvaraš?
Ti si samo kućni ljubimac ograničen u crte pisanja, nisi sranje
Mislila sam da sam zaustavila svoje psihopatske načine, kunem se da jesam
Rekao sam da ću razgovarati s ljudima s problematičnim životom u kojem sam živio
Bili su moji susjedi; britvice
I različite tablete s okusom koje sam pogodio
Stoga sam, zasigurno, moja posljednja slama
Tako sam gasiran, zaglavljen u prošlosti, rekao sam to
[Zbor]
Djevojko, nadam se da razumiješ, htio sam te držati za ruku
Ali ne mogu, tada sam htio biti tvoj čovjek
[Post-zbor]
I do sada te nikad nisam držao rukama
Dakle, teško je biti onaj s kojim niste
Umjesto ispunjene tjeskobom, uvijek je bio dio mene
Pretpostavljam da nisam izrezan da budem
[Stih 2]
Netko zato što to nisam ja, nisam navikao na sve razgovore
Bio introvert koji je pretvarao osjećaje u pisanje
Koristio se da se nosim sa svim mojim problemima koristeći note i puno rima
Nekad se nadao boljim danima kad god bi me noći plakale
Ne lažem kad kažem da bih radije umro nego da se vratim
U vrijeme bih pokušao biti tip kojeg ljudi znaju
Kao i uvijek borba s demonima koji se skrivaju daleko iza mojih kapka
Na otoku punom nasilja, u glavi sam imao dva pilota
Oh, sunce ne sja, a nebo postaje sivo
Osjećam da mi to prolazi kroz vene
Rekao sam prije nego što nisam dobro
Ali ionako ne slušaš
Znaš da sam pokušao, okrenuo si se
Ravno si lagao pravo na moje lice
Jebali si mi život, upropastio mi je dan
Ali ne znaš, pa ću reći
[Most]
Ništa ne može ispuniti ovu tišinu, nitko ne može voljeti kao ja
(Ne znate, pa ću reći)
Nikoga nije briga, lagao si, nije fer, još uvijek to negiraš
(Pa ću reći)
Ništa ne može ispuniti ovu tišinu, nitko ne može voljeti kao ja
(Ne znate, pa ću reći)
Nikoga nije briga, lagao si, nije fer, još uvijek to negiraš
(Pa ću reći)
[Zbor]
Djevojko, nadam se da razumiješ, htio sam te držati za ruku
Ali ne mogu, tada sam htio biti tvoj čovjek
[Post-zbor]
I previše loše znam da se ne mogu probuditi jer sam izgubio put
A ti se ne zajebavaš o meni, ovo bi mogao biti san
Ne vidim stvari koje vidite, pa molim, oh
[Zbor]
Djevojko, nadam se da razumiješ, htio sam te držati za ruku
Ali ne mogu, tada sam htio biti tvoj čovjek
[Post-zbor]
I znali ste i igrali se zajedno
Bila si moj dom, napisao sam ti pjesme
Sad si mi mrtav, učinkovito
Uklonili se izvan mojih snova